Reds Pose with Serious Expressions, Dominate Cardinals 8-3

Two strong performances against a previously hot team, in front of the home crowd? The one out of five in attendance who were actually for the home team were undoubtedly quite pleased with the outcomes of games one and two in the series with the Cards. Now you can not only dump your beer on the old lady in your section wearing the Cardinals hat but accompany the soaking with an insult regarding the play of her team. Be sure to tell your mother all about it tomorrow, it is a holiday after all.

Cueto continued his dominance yesterday, pitching 7 strong and laying down a wide array of interesting sacrifice bunts. The idea is to clip the ball with the bottom quarter of the bat, bouncing it off the plate high into the air. He has it down to the a science. He'll take that extra base when you're not paying attention every time. Even without Billy Hatcher reminding him of the rules. Weathers picked a good game to become ineffective, with a 4-run cushion in the 8th. That allowed Coco the opportunity to pick up another save. He feels like he needs to validate that big contract to you fans.

Today, Corporal Clegg, with the wooden leg, also went 7, and with the exception of a two-out bomb from Ludwick and an unearned run, pitched very fine. In both games the offense decided to show up. The Reds Rocket has determined that Votto with all of his hitting has proven to be a crutch for the rest of the positional players. While he receives care for the hog dysentery, everyone else has had to make like a regular offense. Both games featured first inning runs, putting the starters at ease. Whoa now, simmer down there big fella', look at the scoreboard. See? Two runs. Have a carrot. Tough break for the owner of the tiny novelty beard, Lohse, but that's how the team treats ex-Reds. Even if management received uncharacteristically large salad-tosser Matt Baloney in return.

Tomorrow, as has been long predicted, Reds continue their dominance of everyone. After one more with at home with the Cardinals, they hit the road for a three-game set in front of the serpents beginning Monday. The Reds Rocket, as dwellers of the desert and, thus, questioned Reds loyalists, will finally have an opportunity to view the games in person and tell Volquez how much we like his hair. It looks like a giant spider is crawling out from under your hat, which is wicked sweet. Reds! Reds! Reds!