Thursday, September 27, 2007

Reds Support Belisle With Worst Lineup In Major League History, Surprisingly Lose Fifth Straight

I can just imagine the look on Belisle's face when he checked out the lineup card before taking the field today. So, he knew what he had to accomplish and was close to it, pitching perfect baseball for six innings. But he gave up a couple of runs in the seventh and then the bullpen followed with an uncharacteristic implosion and the Reds lost again. But Mr. Redlegs did wrestle an astronaut into submission prior to the game. Shove it up your ass Mr. Aldrin.

The author lacks the mental capabilities to research or quantify tonight's lineup, but offensively, it had to make a list somewhere. Either best or worst, you choose. Votto and Encarnacion are at least young players who will likely have productive major league careers. But, as well as Hopper and Keppinger [he was waived prior to the season by the Royals] have played in the second half, they're both journeymen and have about as much power as Betty White, post Golden Girls, combined. Then big time acquisition Cantu hit 5th, followed by Daggum Ross making a rare appearance out of the eight hole. I suppose he can strikeout just as effectively at six as he can at eight. "Daggum, I swear Skip I'm gonna to hit that ball over them mountains." Then Mackanin wrapped things up with Pervis Ellison, who simply has one of the worst bats I have ever witnessed, but evidently a little better than Pedro Lopez, as he was slotted in front of him in the order. At least Pedro didn't get hit in the face. Though there is still some room for improvement, as the team reactiviated Mark Belhorn. Get him in at third base and that's a lineup you can set your watch to. But boy would that have been sweet if Eddie's bomb held up and the Reds got the win. Maybe tomorrow against the Cubs, no better way to crush a team and a city's spirits than beating them with a line-up that screams get this season over already. Go get 'em boys.

1 comment:

Aaron said...

I nominate this for POST of the YEAR for the Annual Blogger Awards in the sports category > baseball > humor. I have no idea if such a thing exists but I guess it does, and this right here is the best blog post I have read all year. Totally hilarious and captured my thoughts perfectly.