Sunday, April 19, 2009

Reds Fly to Moon, Beat on Astronauts Like Superman Two

The Reds continued their strong play on their first, and longest, road trip of the year. Pounding on the Astros like there were children in those suits. For those of you who think that Mr. Redlegs would be above wailing on children, don't know Mr. Redlegs. No age discrimination when it comes to issuing savage beatings.

Ramon Hernandez made me feel bad about all of those dead squirrels I had mailed to his house with a 9th inning shot off Papa Grande. But as Dusty would say, there's no taking back a dead squirrel. That's one of his favorite expressions. Hernandez (who also added a single today!) took a 1-2 pitch from Papa Grande Valverde on a line out of the yard to prevent Oswalt from winning his one thousandth game against Cincinnati. Tough break Roy Boy. I'm sure that made for a long drive home from the game in your bulldozer. Asshole.

Saturday, the team looked less good, so we'll gloss over the offense looking both mentally and physically handicapped against Wandy Rodriguez, and move on to today's victory over the Astronauts. The offense looked equally awful for six innings against some guy I had to look up in my nerd book. Paulino? Never heard of you but I'm sure you're no Brandon Backe. That guy's lights out. But then the Astros' bullpen decided that they'd rather spend Sunday dinner as losers. I respect their decision. Geoff Geary walked a guy, gave up the aforementioned single to Hernandez, which is simply unforgiveable, fielded a bunt and threw it into the stands, then gave up a two-run double to a pinch hitting pitcher. Nice outing Geoff. Now maybe you'll agree to start spelling your name like a regular guy named Jeff.

Not to overlook Owings' rocket off the wall but we all know he can rake the yard. If the Reds need a pitcher to carry the offense, at least they're man enough to admit it. Said Alex Gonzalez after the game, "The idea of using a wooden stick to hit a rounded piece of leather, confounds me." Way to step up Alex.

Overall, positive weekend for the Reds. Volquez's line looked better but he sure does like pitching with runners on base. Thankfully the out factories which proceed Carlos Lee were more than willing to bail him out of the bases loaded jam he created each inning. Win number two is still win number two. Reds take the third of four tomorrow. Reds! Reds! Reds!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This is the type of investigative journalism I've waited for all winter!