Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Reds Wandied, A-Holes 8-3

For the second time this season the Reds were hypnotized by Cosmonaut pitcher Wandy Rodriguez. I had thought that one win per season was all the Reds had budgeted for Wandy. Turns out I was wrong and the Reds guaranteed themselves a losing homestand against two teams, at least at this point in the season, they should be beating.

Harangor Papa Goulash as his kids call him, wasn't great yesterday but the defense certainly didn't do him any favors. After giving up a single to super-talen Kaz Matsui to open things, after Matsui stole second, Votto made a couple of errors and poof, like Charles Manson once he gets out on parole, Matsui was standing at home plate. McDonald later misplayed a double in the four-run 5th. Papa Goulash exited after said four-run fifth and flew down to Guatemala, where he destroyed a village with his great strength and rage.

On a more positive note, Phillips hit the ball hard three time yesterday. A double and a bomb, with a solid fly out to center in between. Maybe, he's remembered how to use that bat. Also, Laynce Nix, back to his much more accustomed pinch-hitting role, also hit a bomb. Way to not play terribly like the rest of those bozos.

Finally, we saw the arrival of Adam Rosales for the first time in 2009. He spent some time with the big club in '08 when the rosters expanded and, as I recall, struggled with big league pitching. However, work with Tom Emanski over the offseason seems to have paid off. At the time of his call he was hitting .431/.479/.754 with the Bats. Not too bad. Adam is 25, from Chicago and, when permitted, prefers to wear suspenders instead of a belt. Nice to see you. Now let's hit a little bit. Eddie will be back in two weeks and will be sniffing around 3rd base again. We here at the Reds Rocket, as you may know, are Encarnacion fans, even with averages under .140. So, you'll have to show us as much as you show Dusty.


Anonymous said...

Why is Mr. Red stroking on that dildo?

The Last Unitard said...

Because he doesn't have a penis.

Captain Ron said...

why does he look so happy about it then?