Mr. Redlegs Serves Barbeque Featuring Grilled Bear, Slow Roasted Hipster Cubs Fans, Reds 14-3

Following the disappointing loss Saturday, the Reds apparently thought things over and decided that they were not satisfied with a split in the series with the vastly inferior Cubs. Dusty locked the team in a large cage, starved them, sang out of tune and got the offense ready to play some baseball. Leake staked Chicago to an early 2-0 lead but you wouldn't be able to tell that by looking at the final. Unless, you looked at the inning by inning scoring which no one has time to do.

The Reds finished things up with a 14-3 victory. Another 7th inning explosion put the game out of reach. Ted Daffodil ended being responsible for 9 runs, which is nice to see. Stubbs went deep three times, looking like a generally competent hitter and drove in five. In addition to Stubbs' three, Phillips, Gomes, Janish-Yanish and Cork's mustache took balls into the seats. Janish-Yanish was filling in as the day's three hole hitter after Votto got the old heave-ho for taking out the fact that he was jobbed out of an All-Star nomination on the umpire, and went 4 for 4 with the aforementioned bomb. He laid down a nice bunt in the fourth with Cabrera on first which preceded a Hernandez two-run triple, giving the Reds their first lead. Hernandez actually had to head out of the game due to all of the hustle, prompting the entrance Cork's mustache.

Leake was pretty solid but didn't really have to be. This is the first time in a while that the offense has decided that it needs to show up to offer any support. That could be due to his last couple of starts where he didn't look as sharp as that goatee he wears.

Back to the All-Star Game, numero uno, Votto absolutely deserves to be there. If he has been not the best National League position player, he has been very close thereto. Kruk broke it down tonight, several Padres pitchers were wrongfully excluded and due to that they had to invite Adrien Gonzalez instead of the Canadian Crippler. But we can still vote him in. The Reds Rocket already turned on its army of spam bots to stuff the ballots. But, even without Votto, the Reds are nicely represented with Rolen, Phillips and Arty Rhodes. Rolen has been there before but this is probably a pretty big deal for B. Phill and Old man Rhodes. When you're in your 31st season and you've never had the opportunity to participate in a mid-season exhibition game rather than spend time with your horrible wife and spoiled children, it's a big deal. Phill will likely have a shot a going in future years. He said that he and his mom will just drive out to Anaheim after the game with the Phillies next Sunday.

Finally, I realize this is an uncharacteristically great amount of words stuffed into a single post, Volquez made what was rumored to be his final rehab start today. He lasted 5, gave up 2 and looked pretty good. The brain trust in the front office has some decisions to make. Wood was good but belongs in the minors, but what about Bailey? He is likely not going to respond well to spending another year in the minors. The team is going to have to re-hire Dick Pole just so Homeboy has someone to blast in the media. "Dick Pole needs to pull his head out of his god-damned ass." Nice series Reds, continue it in New York. Yesterday they gave up a 8-0 lead to the Nationals. Reds! Reds! Reds!