He Can't Hang Around His Mama 'Cause He Scares Her, Votto Three Bombs 9-0

Monster game for Joey Votto today. He went yard three times, drove in four, and stole a base to even out the box score. You take his three and double it and it equals a big time Reds victory. Cubs get sent back home to mama with only the one victory to show for their trouble.

The offense was all around productive today. Dunn and Phillips help up the middle of the order's end of the bargain. Then there was Paul Bako and Jerry Hairston Jr., what did I take a timeship back to 2002 when these guys were borderline major league participants? I thought they were both going to be A-ball hitting/bench coaches by midseason. Bako tied his career high with home runs, with 4, and Hairston's average is .345. At least Patterson is comfortable enough with himself where he doesn't feel the need to change himself based upon your opinion of him.

To keep things interesting, Volquez allowed a few runners to reach via the base on balls. It's good practice if he ever has to pitch out of trouble where the game isn't already out of hand. The records room dug up that in his 7 starts the Reds have scored 44 runs. That figure includes the two games (the one he lost and one no decision) where they went scoreless. In Harang's 8 starts, they've scored 22 runs. Looks like Aaron is going to have to stop giving the offense noogies, wedgies and indian burns. Dunn has previously complained about being called "Scrote" in front of the skanks hanging around outside the locker room. But as of now, Volquez has 5 wins and leads the NL in strikeouts and ERA. Maybe you guys should at least give Krivsky a call. Just because he got canned doesn't mean you can't hang out once in a while. It might be a little weird at first but you'll past it.