Sunday, July 27, 2008

Foggster Makes Rockies Wish They'd Retained His Services, Rockies 11-0

If only the Rockies brass would have agreed to Fig Newton and Capri Sun clauses in the contract proposed by the Foggster's agent this offseason he could still be pitching in Colorado. No matter how hard they tried, you could tell they missed him. And now they're out of luck, he's a Red for the remainder of the season or at least until he gets a more serious head injury or is traded to that professional team in Ecuador.

The Reds are in the process of teaching a valuable lesson about the relative unimportance of sports, in, as they say, the grand scheme of things. Go outside, get some fresh air. Spend some time with friends or Photoshopping Dusty Baker's face onto an image of a shirtless man riding a horse in your parents' basement. There are many things to do when you don't have to sit yourself in front of the tv for three hours on a Sunday afternoon watching Reds players attempt to overcome their general disinterest in being good at the game of baseball. And the Reds Rocket for one is happy with their decision. Nice work you guys, that sweep at the hands of the Rockies really drove things home for me. See you in Houston.

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