Reds Release Broomman From Subterranean Prison, Reds 6-5

Four game sweeps are an uncommon occurrence around Cincinnati, even with a division full of Pirates and Astros. But, the Reds were able to close things out today against the Washington National offensive juggernaut. Coco made things interesting, with a little bit of good old fashioned Canadian laziness by our first baseman friend from the north. 'I'm not aboot to get in front of that ball, right. Eh.'

Volquez considered pitching ineffectively for the 3rd and 4th but, in the end, decided against it and turned in a quality start in route to picking up his 11th win of the year. And today we got word of his official addition to the NL All-Star team. Now he won't have to sell that scrap gold that's been lying around the house, even though the process couldn't be easier and rates are at an all time high. Congratulations good sir. Pick up that last win and you're looking at a starting position. Unless Francona made a deal with Clint Hurdle to include the rest of the Red Sox roster on the National League team. '...and the starting pitcher for the National League, Alex Cora!'

B. Phill picked up a couple more hits, has his average over .290 and Grande Burro ate a trough of hay and hit a rocket out of the field of play. Hairston, Junior continues to make me feel like an asshole. Okay, okay you're a solid player. I feel very bad for how I treated you prior to the season. At least Corey Patterson remembers what the scouting reports say about him. Nice home stand team, 5-2, following a winning road trip? Who are you guys? Enjoy the day off at the water park. Just a warning, Dusty swims with his shirt on. Reds! Reds! Reds!