Reds, I Give You Diamonds, You Give Me Disease....Wait a Minute, Reds Win 4-3

The author would like to begin things by giving a heart felt thank you to Cubs closer Kerry Wood. Wood has never seemed particularly unlikeable, compared to other members of his team. He has monster talent, a string of Dusty-inflicted arm injuries (hey-o!) and still isn't a complete asshole. But if he's going to surrender a series victory to the Reds, I'm going to enjoy every second of Cabrera standing at home plate waving his hands and juggling oranges while the winning run crosses the plate. For those of you swept up in "Bingle Fever" you missed quite a ballgame. If an opening day loss to the Ravens doesn't return your loyalty to the Reds, well, come on back. Optimism only increases anxiety.

The Reds blew the Cubs out on Friday, getting Arroyo his 14th, then felt bad and handed it back to Chicago on Saturday. Though they did show some late heart. They learned a lesson during that game, that if they're going to score 9 runs they must allow 8 or fewer. Dusty went over it with them after the game. They felt more prepared for today's game. I know they looked awful until the 9th but if you've learned anything this season it's that you can't give up on the Reds offense. They'll treat you right. That and they prevented Harang from losing another game that he probably didn't deserve to lose. I say probably because RBI doubles allowed to Ronny Cedeno will not be tolerated. So, for those of you keeping track, that's the 7th loss in 8 games for the Cubs down the stretch. We all knew they had it in them, though, at this late date it may be difficult to play themselves out of the playoffs. Another first round loss will be just as painful and enjoyable. I'm still rooting for a regular season meltdown.

On to the bad news, it appears that my computer is no longer functional. Fortunately, I have a backup but no Photoshop. So, in the interim perhaps some readers would like to create some artwork for the site. Suggestions include: Rick Ankiel receiving a lobotomy; the Brewer mascot giving birth to a pineapple; the St. Valentine's Day massacre recreated with past and present Cub media personalities (I'd recommend at least one of the corpses be Len Kasper); Bronson Arroyo playing guitar with the Doobie Brothers, the Michael McDonald version; or Alan Thicke in a Reds uniform. I'd been meaning to do the final suggestion for quite a while. Anyway, Breworms tomorrow. Reds! Reds! Reds!