Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Reds Rocket Endorses Razor Gator

Hi friends, Tim Timmons, proprietor of the highly successful The Reds Rocket sports weblog. Recently, The Reds Rocket marketing department introduced the "talent" to some new friends, friends with sizable checking accounts. After a brief negotiation period where it was agreed that Tiffee would receive a Cuisinart and six months of Kempo Karate lessons, a binding contract was formed. These people go by the name RazorGator and would like to sell you and your mama a ticket to an upcoming sporting event of your choice. All you do is give them some of your money and in exchange they will provide you with admittance to the venue where the event is being held.
So, let's say I, Tim Timmons, would like to go to a Cincinnati Reds baseball game - which is unlikely because I don't live in the state and am "legally obligated" to remain in the state in which I currently reside - and Reds tickets are not available because the Reds are hugely popular, America's Team, if you will. At that point, I want you to remember Timmons', your friend with an unblemished record of veracity, endorsement of RazorGator. You'll get your tickets behind the visitor’s dugout where you can remind Mark DeRosa how poorly he plays baseball for a full nine innings. You will be amazed what verbal abuse can do for those of you with self esteem problems. That is something of which I would be proud to be a part.

Whether it’s MLB tickets, World Series tickets or hard to get tickets to just about any other major sporting, concert or theater event, just know that The Reds Rocket endorses Razor Gator for great selection and safe, secure purchasing. So there.


The Last Unitard said...

If you were that desperate for money you could have asked me, your loyalest reader.

I would be neither willing nor able to give you any, but I would have appreciated being asked.

Petey Hendrix said...

Slutty - I like it.