The Reds continue their roadshow tonight in Pittsburgh where they'll have three games with One-eyed Blue/Black/Redbeards. The series in Milwaukee was a nice introduction to what they're going to do to the Pirates. Dusty has proclaimed that the beatings will be savage and merciless. "The Reds be goin' crackers" he was quoted as saying last night. Sorry Pittsburgh, but those are the breaks when management continually runs a substandard baseball team out there. So, prepare the pot of steaming rum here's Redsbot 5000's preview of the Pirate starting lineup:1. Nate McLouth CF - borderline retarded, his cleats have velcro fasterers
2. Freddy Sanchez 2B - in an attempt to diversify his wealth, opened the establishment "Freddy's Tuna Melts and Tax Preparation." It's doing quite well.
3. Jason Bay LF - attended Gonzaga University, he quietly weeps in the 8th inning of each game that Pittsburgh is behind
4. Adam LaRoche 1B - is hosting a weekend symposium on compassion
5. Xavier Nady RF - lives in a dumpster outside PNC Park. Teaches kids about numbers and how not to grow up to be like Xavier Nady.
6. Ryan Doumit C - Reds players can thank him for the bidet in the visitor's locker room
7. Jose Bautista 3B - his sirname translates to "fudge pocket"
8. Brian Bixler SS - flew to San Fransisco and tried to put out the Olympic Torch. Once he failed he settled for a vegan quesadilla
9. Paul Maholm P - I think the roster meant to say "Pat Mahomes"
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