Monday, July 16, 2007

I Say Yeah, Yeah, Yeah Atlanta, Got to Get Back to You

Reds continue the traveling salvation show today in Atlanta, a place that they haven't been particularly successful in recent years, due mainly to the Braves having better teams. Not the case this year. Smoltz is on the shelf with a serious case of oldness, Kyle Davies is awful, and we all saw what happened to Tim Hudson during the second half of last season. Tonight, in recognition of their illustrious visitors, the Braves are handing out Braves nacho cheese sauce, it's maize flavored. Bobby Nutsack got another call from Louisville to make the spot start, no reason not to be excited about that. We'll all recall that last time he was very effective, let's see some more of that tonight. So everyone drink your firewater, shoot those boomsticks up in the air and celebrate the many moons since the Great Spirit granted us the Cincinnati Reds. Here is the Atlanta starting lineup:

1. Yunel Escobar 2B - producto de Cuba

2. Edgar Renteria SS - hates Cubans

3. Chipper Jones 3B - has a real knack for catching syphilis

4. Andrew Jones CF - only wears clothing which matches the color of fish found in the lakes of Georgia

5. Jeff Francouer RF - knows many ways to skin a cat and eat it

6. Matt Diaz LF - first name is pronounced "Mate" to respect his family's heritage

7. Brian McCann C - favorite color is periwinkle

8. Matt Saltalamacchia 1B - has 8 members of his family named Guido

9. Kyle Davies P - not related to either brother from the Kinks but has an interesting story which closely mirrors the song "Lola"

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