Monday, May 21, 2007

The Reds Rocket Extends a Very Warm Welcome to the Washington Nationals

The author had been looking for an opportunity to use that picture of the squirrel using the camera. Because Nationals games are so poorly attended, because the team is so poor, piss poor if you will, the author figured that out of the major league teams, they'd be the most likely to employ squirrel photographers, since they work for peanuts and all. Now there's a bad joke.

Anyway, now that the Reds have dropped an even 10 games under .500, it's nice to see some, we'll say, more inferior, competition coming to the old Great American Ballpark. As I mentioned yesterday, 4 with the Nats, followed by 4 with the Pirates, that ought to cure what ails you [or ye']. Because this post is much later in the day than I had intended, we'll forego Redsbot 5000's prediction. You have any idea what a future-predicting robot costs to keep up and running? Well, more than the zero dollars I am currently making on a daily basis. Here's today's starting Nationals lineup:

1. Felipe Lopez 2B - has a bald eagle airbrushed on his Ford F-150

2. Cristian Guzman SS - best offensive shortstop in the Major Leagues

3. Ryan Zimmerman 3B - has papers in the works to legally change his name to Ryan Zimmerm. Has a nice ring to it.

4. Dmitri Young 1B - thinks Schneider is stealing from his locker

5. Austin Kearns RF - the Nationals' boxscores are one of the few the author reads on a daily basis and that is to keep an eye on Kearns' production. We still like him around these parts

6. Brian Schneider C - nickname is "Hoops"

7. Nook Logan CF - Nook's first name is Exavier, that's right, the letter 'x' is spelled out

8. Ryan Langerhans LF - here are some stats: 3 for 44 with the Braves at the time of his trade to the A's [0 for 4 with the A's]. Can't say we're upset to see him back in the NL.

9. Levale Speigner P - of 100% Irish descent

No comments: