Finals

The author tries to bring as little of his personal life, which does not directly relate to the Cincinnati Reds, into this blog. But today, since it's a travel day, maybe one of the members of the team would like to give him a hand with some school work. Being that the author is not always particularly wise with his time throughout the semester, [see mindless recaps of baseball games interspersed with"funny" commentary] the week directly proceeding final examinations serves as very important time period. Well, that week is upon us [we get to type our exams, that's why the chimp is at the typewriter] and the author would hate for the two years of hard work to become a certified medical billing specialist, to go down the drain. I just can't wait to get all that paperwork in front of me. The author has compiled a list of potential tutors, based upon educational merit, who could possibly provide assistance.

1. Kirk Saarloos, Cal State-Fullerton - the author doesn't know much about Fullerton other than they're typically good at baseball. Phil Nevin and Mark Kotsay seem like pretty smart guys and they both went there. And by all accounts, Saarloos graduated, though the author's cursory search did not indicate in what field of study. We'll keep him in the maybe category.

2. Eddie Guardado, San Joaquin Delta Coll. CA (J.C) - the author had almost forgotten about "Every Six Months" Eddie, but he's sure to have a little free time. He did attend college, here’s the link, seems like a pretty nice place. The only problem is that in the top corner of the link there is a picture of a steamship. That seems okay, until you realize they're not the San Joaquin Delta College Boats, but the San Joaquin Delta College Mustangs. This raises serious questions regarding the quality of the education Eddie received.

3. Scott Hatteberg, Washington State - come on, he went to Washington State, no way this guy isn't an asset to anyone interested in learning.

4. David Weathers, Motlow State CC - this was another educational institution the author was not aware existed. This is in no way meant as a shot at the Motlow State Community College, I'm sure there are numerous fine institutions of which the author has not heard. However, this is the picture found on the home page


Seriously, that's the first image that comes up when you get to the school's website. I have no idea what to make of it.

5. Jeff Guy Conine, UCLA - now get this, Conine, who the author had no idea had the middle name of Guy, went to UCLA. He didn't graduate, but still, that's pretty impressive. He was on an economics track at the time he was drafted in the 58th round by the Royals. Looks like he is the winner of the privilege of stuffing information into the author's defective brain. Way to go Guy.